Winds of Change

Ok- I said I'd do a video last time but I haven't had time yet- Hopefully i'll do a video one of these days :) These past few weeks have been crazy, fun, crazy fun, and full of change pants. I moved home to my parents' house and in the mean time, accepted a position to do a year of volunteer work. First, moving home was crassayyyy. There were a couple hiccups in the day but it turned out just fine... It's crazy to be home again but I do love my framily. We've all been hanging out a lot doing lots of fun sings togesser... horseback riding, going to the county fair, white water rafting, shopping, going to old town Fort Collins, having meals together, laughing, and just enjoying each others' company :) I'll admit that being home definitely threw a curve in my routine for feeling healthier. I'm sure you know the feeling of being out of your routine in a new place. But it's getting better for sure. Two things I need to remember: to pray and to keep trying to do better when I mess up.

Sooo in between taping boxes and scrubbing my shower, I was applying, interviewing and accepting volunteer work on the east coast! I'll be at a high school for at-risk youth and I couldn't be more excited and humbled to have the opportunity to work with this school. I'll be living with the four other volunteers who are working at the high school as well as three nuns. I'll be substitute and ropes course certified upon arrival but until I feel comfortable substituting, I'll be helping in classes as needed, doing admin work, helping with after school activities, and helping wherever they have need. I can't wait to get the year started- It's going to be a great year of growth and learning! All of the readings and songs in mass this morning were about having no fear and knowing that we can do anything with faith in God. "Do not be afraid I am with you, I have called you each by name.... I love you and you are mine"-- that song was played this morning and whether or not you like the song, I do haha, and it makes me cry every time. I have no idea why. It just gets me! Remember that time I didn't trust God and everything turned out great? Oh yeah... that happens a lot ;) but really, I think it was really affirming- since all of this happened so quickly, it's nice to hear that God has a hand in it and I'm not just crazy to suddenly decide to do this work.

The last thing I want to say is how blessed and thankful I am for all of the love and support from my friends and family. I am truly humbled by all the support I've gotten and will keep you all in my prayers and in the loop as I begin this year long journey on the east coast!

Ad maiorem Dei gloriam

Joy-filled

Here are just a few of the recent events in my summer :)

Jen's at it again! Quite the cowgirl


A walk through CSU's flower garden. Kate is doing her masters at CSU and I drop her off right next to the gardens so one day, I went for a run and then walked through the gardens-- something I've wanted to do since coming to school :)


Azra (our German exchange student from last year) came back! We were so excited at the airport-- but I was too excited to take any actual pictures of her when we finally saw her... haha so here's Lucy and I before she came through the gate!


We (but mostly my amazing Dad) threw a surprise party for my mom! This picture's worth a thousand words-- she was SO happy!


We ate great food and danced into the night!

Hipsters and King Soopers

I would just like to start today by pointing out that my friend, Emily Snyder, thinks I'm hipster for blogging. You should get to know her cuz she's so hipster she doesn't even know that she's hipster.

Most recently, I've been learning how I can turn something that sounds unappealing into something that is fun and for the greater glory of God. I got a part time job at NY&Co. and at first I didn't really want to do it. After some thought and ingredients for a positive attitude, I'm really looking forward to it! First, I'm thinking I definitely need a little laughter. Laughing (as u can probably tell) is one of my most favorite past times. Even hipsters laugh sometimes. So should you! Second, I think it's important to think of others first . So with this job, I can go into it with the attitude of serving others and making the women who come in the store feel beautiful as we all are! Third, we all need to wear something outrageous once in a while- like the hats em and I found for the fourth of july. Maybe I'll wear my tiara as I get ready every day. (btw- don't name ur kids nevaeh- heaven spelled backwards. it's cheezy) Fourth, jam to good music on the way to work and on the way home. Gets ya goin every time... and last, whatever you do, dooon't make gun hands in photos. If they end up on facebook, you'll be embarrassed and depressed the rest of the day while you work. hehe but really, there's always a way to make something unappealing become appealing. If you need help with this just let me know- I'm happy to offer my brilliant solutions when I can ;)

I got off track with eating the past couple days but I'm ready to get back on track. It's so easy to beat ourselves up for messing up but the reality is that we are human and we fall. Wanna know one of my little tricks!? First, I'll point out that I really love nuts and seeds. I bought these cinnamon covered almonds from Kings that have a little sugar on them too... so every time I crave sweets, I just have an almond or two (being careful not to grab 10 cuz I could honestly eat the whole bag hahaha) and it generally helps! I've also started eating hardboiled egg whites and that really kills a craving to eat and eggs are cheap! But I like the almonds cuz they're still healthy but give u a little kick of sugar and taste oh so yummy :)

for my next blog, i'm going to try to do a video-- stay tuned :)

Steubenville of the Rockies

"Pooped" would be an accurate word to describe my physical state at the moment ;) I got the chance, very last minute, to chaperone Steubenville of the Rockies this weekend- a regional 3 day conference for high school youth. They had speakers, a worship band, mass, adoration, confession, a concert, small groups, and lotttts of goofing around :) it was definitely a great experience! Btwn 1,000 and 1,500 youth were there and it was truly a blessing to see them all search for answers and try to build a relationship with Christ. I will definitely keep them in my prayers- especially as they go back to their schools and friends and try to defend their faith... The photo (tho crappy quality) is of all the youth and chaperones from our church- we had 19 teens, 4 chaperones and Lisa... we're all lookin pret-ty BA with our foco shirts. It's ok to be jealous :P Even though I was there for the teens, I definitely think God spoke to me a lot as well. It was cool because the first song the band played on Friday was "I am Free" by Newsboys (I was just talking about my goal to be freed in my faith and physical life in a previous blog), followed by a few other songs about being free in Christ. It was so great to be affirmed in that goal.

"Do you feel like you can have an open personal relationship with Christ? What's holding you back?" This reflection question was convicting for me because it really challenged me to think about what I put in the way of my relationship with Christ, even after years and years of practicing my faith. It also helped me think about what things I hold onto in my life that I turn to for safety but actually keep me from happiness. After reflecting on all of this, I am sure God and I have a lot of chit chatting to do in the next year ;)

Lots of good things this week- for starters, the whole fam is home! YAY! Bbsitting, job hunting, fam time, meeting up with friends, softball, Bachelorette (yes, the secret is out. I watch it. Annnd it's exhausting to keep up with this chick and her drama).... Gotta go to bed to get some energy back for all this ;)

Laughing

... They say it's one of life's best medicines :) I think it's so important to surround ourselves with people who make us laugh. It's during those times that we laugh straight from the gut that we become unaware of all our worries and fill our "joy cup" if you will. I've always loved other peoples' laughs... they're so contagious! This morning I was thinking about how much I laugh or smile vs how much I think about something I don't like about myself or something I don't want to do during the day. How about you!? How can we make those frowns lit'terally turn upside down!? I've started reading "Life without limits" by Nick Vujicic. It's a book I got for graduation and it's written by this guy who was born without any limbs- so he basically has his abdomen and then it looks like he has a left foot at the bottom of his abdomen. He wrote this book about "inspiration for a ridiculously good life". I just read the beginning of it and i'm pretttty sure it's gonna be awesome :) Some of the things he says it takes for a life without limits are:

"A powerful sense of purpose
Hope so strong that it cannot be diminished
Faith in God and the infinite possibilities
Love and self-acceptance
Attitude with altitude
A courageous spirit
Willingness to change
A trusting heart
Hunger for Opportunities
The ability to assess risks and to laugh at life
A mission to serve others first"

Seem like pretty good ways to live positively and joyfully- I'll keep you posted on how the book goes :)

I'm also trying to do one small thing each day to connect with God/take a little quiet time. Whether it's 5 minutes or 50 minutes, it doesn't matter. Baby steps for now. I think the mornings are always the best time for this, but, of course, any time really works. It's also nice to just have a moment to slow down from life's crazy speed and just be.

As a final note, this is one of the first Youtube baby videos I saw- it's one of my favs... and he kinda sounds like me... the weezer. hope it makes you laugh too :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P6UU6m3cqk

New Beginnings

I've decided I'm going to start blogging again and maybe try to keep up with it more now that it's summer and I'm jumping into a new chapter of life :)

I graduated from CSU with my Bachelors of Science degree in Interior Design. My final capstone project was a pediatric center for children who suffer from physical, emotional or mental disabilities. Services within the building included physical therapy, occupational therapy, music therapy, speech therapy, family therapy, and a few others... I also included a cafeteria, daycare, residential suites for longer term patients, a cafe, a chapel, and children's play areas. I found the psychology behind healthcare design to be incredibly fascinating. The power of design in the healing process is a lot greater than people understand, thus, I absolutely loved doing all the research for my project. Coming into school I was set on residential design; however, after my capstone project, I have found a great love for healthcare design and hope to continue designing in this area of the field.

This summer has been absolutely wonderful. After graduation, I took a little time for myself to recoup from my senior year and catch up on some things I've been putting off. Hiking, going to the butterfly pavilion, joining a rec softball team, shopping, reading, getting together with friends, cleaning, and loving old town have all been a part of my fun... In the end of May, a couple of my friends, Emily Koenning and Emily Weber, left for FOCUS training so we all hung out and went to a Rockies game... always a blast :) In the beginning of June, I went to see Emily Frost (my college roommate of the past 2 yrs) in her hometown, Rapid City, SD. I stayed at her house and we went into rapid, went for a run, went out to eat, laid by the pool, etc.... It was so great to be back together and meet her friends/family from home that I had heard so many great things about! After I got back I came back to foco and did a ton of job searching for temporary jobs (waiting, retail, etc) because I'm still a little unsure of what I want to do. Nothing went through with that :/ In the middle of the month, my dad's dad passed away. My parents flew out to NJ for the funeral and I went home to be with my younger siblings -- I was back and forth between foco and berthoud a lot but it all worked out just fine :) I'm very sad at the loss of my grandpa, and I am also relieved that he is in a better place, not suffering.

This past weekend, I went to Lake Powell with some friends from my freshman and sophomore yr at CSU... we had a BLAST! If you ever get the chance to go to lake powell, GO! It's beautiful. My friends, Crystal and Kirk, work there and they got us a double decker party boat, power boat for tubing and wakeboarding, and a jet ski... the trip was dirt cheap cuz there was so many of us and we just had a great great time.

SNAP BACK TO REALITY! I got back and felt very motivated to continue the job search. I sent out some applications to design firms last week and plan to follow up with those today and tomorrow. As you can imagine, the design field is sorta slow right now, particularly in Denver. But i'm hopeful that something is out there for me. It's just a matter of searching and having patience :) At the end of this month, I'll be moving home to save some money on rent until I figure out a job... I don't mind moving in with the fam-- it's the *moving to Berthoud* part that will be a bit difficult haha... everything is temporary :) I have also been considering going back to get my masters degree in school counseling/clinical psychology. I absolutely love this idea but i'm trying to give the design world a fair shot too. (clearly, what i want to do is clear to me ;) haha)

As a final note for this post (sorry i know it's long), I have decided to really take better care of myself spiritually and physically. I was recently reading through a story about someone who likes to make exercising and eating funnn, something I think I have lost sight of. I am also striving to renew my faith and purpose behind my everyday. Sometimes it's easy to get caught up in how you're doing something or compare yourself (relating to our spiritual and physical life), but my friend, emily snyder, made a great point last night when she quoted John 8:36 which says "So if the son sets you free, you are truly free". I have a goal to feel healthier by Christmas, setting myself free of any comparison to others or concern about how I look or numbers on a scale. In addition, I'm hoping to find that freedom again in my faith and relationship with the Father who loves us all so dearly and would never want us to feel burdened by our relationship with Him (Matthew 11:30). I find an immense amount of joy in God and I think I allowed school and other things to get in the way of that this year. Here He is, once again, waiting with open arms as I try to start over again :)

I'll keep you posted on how I go about all of this! I think there will be more frequent, *shorter* posts after this ;) I'm very excited for the next chapter in my life- I have no idea what it looks like right meow, but I have great confidence that God has it written and all I can do is my best :)

My interior design through interior design

It's truly hard to believe that 3 1/2 years have gone by so quickly. I came into college (after taking an interior design class at my high school) knowing that I wanted to do interior design. I signed up for all of my classes at orientation and was ready to go- INTD 129, intro to interior design, here we go! That class gave me an ity bitty glimpse of what interior design really meant- not just "fluff" like pillows and paint colors but actually more about space planning, elements and principles of design, need for nature, the psychology behind design, lighting, and much much more. And that was just the tip of the iceberg.

Going into my final semester of college I have come to realize that I have learned SO much about interior design, and I feel I have learned just as much about the design of my "interior" and who I am (cheesy but true hehe). I am so incredibly thankful for the opportunities God has given to me at CSU to make me who I am today. From learning how to ride my bike on the side of a busy road my freshman year, to learning to love all people for who they are and meet them where they're at (acquaintances, roommates, classmates, professors), to stepping out of my comfort zone and moving to New Jersey for a summer internship, my college career has been full of blessings and learning opportunities that have shaped my heart for the better. My parents always told me that college was a lot about learning to learn, and I have found this to be incredibly true. I am so thankful for my amazing family and the unfailing love and support they have given to me. They have helped me understand that I can truly be who I want to be and do the things I want to do with a little motivation and faith. In addition, I am so thankful for my foco family of friends. Truly, I do not understand how I would ever be worthy of having such an amazing group of friends, and for these people I am so so thankful. My friends have been the ones to have lunch with me when I would have eaten alone in the dining hall, to talk with me late at night when I was stressed about a project or couldn't figure something out, to grab a drink on a Tuesday night and laugh together, and most of all, to share our lives with each other and walk with each other through the journey of life. My friends and family have been so incredibly crucial in supporting me through the good and the bad, through the changes that have made me me! Last and not least, rather most important, my faith has truly been the designer of my interior. "Trusting" is one of the most amazing and most difficult things i've ever done. I will say that I definitely still struggle with it- and I feel it's often a life-time struggle- but it's sooo important. Because of the trust I have learned to put in God, I feel an amazing amount of excitement and peace about my next chapter of life. I say this with great thanksgiving for the lessons i've learned that have brought me to this point. I've stressed over projects and decisions one too many times to think that I should worry about the future for one minute. I have no idea what I will be doing after May 14th, but i'm pretty sure someone else knows and will guide me along the way :) Just for a glimpse into my thoughts, i'm thinking I would love to go to somewhere like Southern California and start my own eyebrow waxing salon.... jokes.... for realzz I am very interested in working with people and serving in some way. Some thoughts are health care design (my senior capstone project is a pediatric center... the healing aspects of design are truly amaaazzzing and inspire me), some sort of missionary work, something crazy fun but financially stable like an aupair abroad?... I dunno! As you can see, the opportunities are endless and I'm very excited and thankful for whatever is coming :) but back to my original point of faith, I really would not be here today without this amazing gift and tool. I can truly say that God has been my rock and stronghold through college and I give Him total credit for every year I've made it through!

As a final note, I think often times society tells us that we have to be the best at everything, be at the top of the list, to look and act a certain way... yes it's important to set goals and support yourself/your family.... but I think we find ourselves comparing ourselves to others and becoming miserable because we don't have this or don't look like that. If there's one thing interior design has taught me, it's that every space is different and though two buildings may have the same windows and same shingled roof, each interior can be different and each interior (and exterior!) can be beautiful! I have found such passion for the dignity of a human being and spreading this truth to everyone everywhere. After volunteering at a soup kitchen last month as a part of my service learning project for my senior capstone, my heart sunk. People would walk through the line with their heads down and talk very quietly. Each and every person who walked through that line is no less or greater than me and you, and it made me sick to think that they felt ashamed or any less than anyone. We have all be created equal, with equal dignity, equal rights to receive and give love and respect, and equal beauty. Before coming to college, I think I recognized this subconsciously but many experiences throughout my years at CSU, like the soup kitchen, have given me a greater perspective of the world and how what the world truly needs now is love, sweeeeet love :) and Je-suuuus woop woop

Words do not describe how thankful I am for the opportunities that have made me who I am today. I really feel so thankful for the people i've met, places i've been and things i've done the past 3 1/2 years. I would definitely not be the same if it were not for each and every step that it took to get me here. I'm just so undeserving and very thankful. I go into my last semester ready to conquer these last few projects and explore the new opportunities ahead. Sad? yes. Excited and so freaking ready to graduate? yes. Bittersweet, really...

I'm so thankful for all the women who have walked with me through the interior design program and all the professors who have helped us learn and grow. I know, i know, i've said it so many times but i'm just so thankful for my family, friends, faith.... As the movie title so wonderfully puts it, "It's a wonderful life" :)

Cheers to many more learning experiences to design who we are and opportunities to love, give and grow!